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San Francisco Gay Kink Festival Offers Limp-Wristed Health Advice in Face of Monkeypox Crisis

New gay pride flag just dropped
New gay pride flag just dropped

San Francisco decided to push forward with its annual “Up Your Alley Street Festival” AKA weekend-long-gay-hairy-fetish-hungry-piggy-leather-BDSM-group-sex-party this past Saturday. This happened despite having recently declared a public health emergency over Monkeypox, and the fact that gay men—or “men who have sex with men” if you prefer—make up over 95% of documented cases.

If you think my description above was outlandish, take a look at how they themselves described their “festival”:

Dear God

Dear God

But don’t think they took this issue lightly! In the face of this incredibly specific health crisis, they took the brave stance of actively encouraging everyone to still go and engage in debauchery, while timidly offering some advice that you can take (or not!).

Feel free to take zero Monkeypox precautions, but do make sure you wear a mask!

Feel free to take zero Monkeypox precautions, but do make sure you wear a mask!

Infectious disease specialist Dr. Peter Chin-Hong gave his incredibly astute take on the matter by stating the obvious:

I think probably more risky things in both Outside Lands and Dore Alley will be the things that happen after the event or around the private event spaces, where people are intimate with each other.

They, incredibly, kick off their advice by emphasizing that, in no way, should the “piggy parties” be skipped:

I don't even want to know what that blue thing is supposed to be

I don’t even want to know what this blue thing is supposed to be

They then go on to list way too many possibilities on how one might be able to contract such a disease:

A lot of information I didn’t need to know

Finally, they close out their advice by saying that even if you think you may have Monkeypox, feel free to go out anyway, just slap a band-aid or T-shirt over the diseased area:

Only thing stronger than a COVID mask is a single band-aid

Only thing stronger than a COVID mask is a single band-aid

The most incredible part of this all is the how disparate the response has been between this and COVID. For over a year, you couldn’t go to the gym, church, school, theater, or restaurants all to stop the spread.

Yet simply asking gays to keep it in their pants for a few weeks is a request so insurmountable and bigoted, we have no choice but to let it happen.

Opposition

Thankfully though, there has been resistance to this creeping ideology and many opposition groups have stood up in protest of this degeneracy.

In New Jersey, the European Heritage Association protested a drag queen story hour

In New Jersey, the European Heritage Association protested a drag queen story hour

In Florida, even the Proud Boys protested a trans rights event

In Florida, even the Proud Boys protested a trans rights event

Here a jew laments the fact the people oppose child abuse, while describing her incredibly resilient jewish grandparents

Here a jew laments the fact that people oppose child abuse, while referencing her 7 time world champion grandparents

Sam Caldwell
Social Nationalist and based book enthusiast. Hail National Justice Party.

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